Are our lives scripted or written as we go along?
This has been a life-long question for me. Often times we hear the phrases “if it’s meant to be, it will be” or “ it’s fate” or “it is God’s will”. These lend to the idea that somewhere in the heavens there’s a book with each of our names on it: pages written, illustrations drawn, chapters entitled for the various eras experienced in life.
I must admit, there’s something comforting in this…in the idea that we’re here for a specific purpose, meant to be something, do something…that there’s a grand plan.
The hitch is this: even in my religious upbringing where leaving things in God’s hands is encouraged, there is the notion of choice, free will. Many of us are blessed with so many options and possibilities that the outcomes are endless.
This leaves to question: so how much of our lives do we create?
Recently, I’ve come to a major cross-roads in my life. And while it seemed as if there were only two marked paths, the truth is that there are many many more.
Here’s where I am at the moment: Craig and I have left our teaching jobs. Our belongings are in a storage space in Seoul awaiting an address for shipping. There’s a ticket to Laos with our names on it scheduled for October.
Seems pretty straight forward. But, coming home to Canada and California has opened a can of worms. While familiar, there’s a novelty of life here that is attractive. Witnessing the family-making, home-owning lives of friends has me wonder about going overseas again. What if one or both of us was offered the opportunity to work here in areas of interest? What would it be like to rent a place where we’d know neighbors and the lady in the coffee shop? Would we be happier with a yard, a car, a dog?
There are many things that can happen from this point. Inviting uncertainty into our lives has been challenging, and last week I felt like I was spinning. It was just then that something happened.
Sitting in a cafe, facing a brick wall, I noticed small scrolls of paper sticking out of crevices between bricks. There were three spaced out perfectly so that one was in front of each of my two friends and me. Curious, we took them. Handwritten messages spilled out. I read mine last.
DEAR YOU,
YOU ARE A CHILD OF THE UNIVERSE,
NO LESS THAN THE TREES AND THE STARS.
AND WHETHER OR NOT IT IS CLEAR TO YOU,
NO DOUBT THE UNIVERSE IS UNFOLDING EXACTLY AS IT SHOULD.
YOU ARE LOVED.
PASS IT ON.
I smiled. It felt as if this message was for me. It was the reminder I needed, a confirmation of purpose and love.
Within the doubt, there is beauty. Amid the seeming chaos, there is perfection. Underneath the uncertainty, there is a plan.
Perhaps the question posed is a resounding YES. To some extent the Universe/God has plans for us: to be our highest selves. And, as creative beings, we’re here to make a connection, our mark, a difference in our own unique way.
Certainly, the words in the wall speak to us all…and so I pass them on.
{What do you think? Do you believe in Fate? Are we sole drivers of our lives?}
Happy Impermanence 